changes, part 3

the final stage in the change trifecta is the otherwise.

ah, the otherwise. named as such because it is the reason i am where i am today, and i haven't quite decided if it was a good change or a bad change.

the otherwise.

august 24, 2012

i left my job at the flag place.

some may say this is good. leaving a job clearly means you are moving on to bigger and better things, right? in this case, i was very wrong. i was hoping for bigger and better. unfortunately, that's not what i got.

my job at the flag place was pretty straightforward. take orders, enter them in the system, deal with customers. when i started, i was busy. and i loved it. my days went by so quickly. some days i felt like i was losing my head, but it was still a productive day. then things started to change. there it is again, that evil change. anyway, we weren't as busy. people ordered less flags. they began to shift the work around, to balance it out. when you get used to working at such a hectic pace, and constantly being busy, it's hard to adjust to a slower pace.

other things were changing too. the staff in my department went through a few changes. and unfortunately, for lack of a better term, there were some personality clashes. i am what i am. some people get me. some don't. and if you don't, well, i can come across as a downright bitch. but i do like and get along with most people. believe me, if i don't like you, you'll know it. i make it quite obvious. so that added an extra element of stress to my day. worrying if i was going to say the wrong thing and offend some one. not the way i like to spend my time.

another change happened when we got a new manager. she was awesome. but she wanted to streamline the department, make us a more efficient, well oiled machine. nothing wrong with that, but i lost more of my daily tasks, and they weren't replaced. super frustrating.

enter hr lady. now when you work in a small company, everybody gets into everybody's business. sometimes for good, sometimes for bad. and hr lady decided to get into my business and develop a dislike for me. granted, i wasn't to fond of her, especially after a personality clash, where she called me a bully, and basically a bitch. for an hr lady, she sucked at it. her people skills are certainly lacking. after that particular incident, i was so pissed off. i almost quit then and there. but common sense got the best of me, and i decided it would be better to stick around for awhile. it also frustrated me because i had no recourse. where do you go when you can't go to hr because they are the problem, and the owners of the company aren't really involved the the day to day running's because they live elsewhere?

despite having an awesome supervisor, and liking my job, most of the time, i was getting the feeling it was time to move on. it's a weird feeling. like you know the end is coming, you just don't know when.

anyway, i had been searching for awhile. mostly trying to get closer to home to avoid the awful commute, especially because of all the construction they were doing, and of course, more money. but the job market sucks. it still sucks, that's why i'm still looking. anyway, out of all the resumes i sent, i was coming up with nothing.

enter deka.

(now i don't like to name drop, but i'm going to make an exception here, because what they did to me was wrong, i'm still pissed off about it and i don't care if they know it.)

anyway, i sent my resume in january of 2012. the hr lady there really liked it, and called me right away for an interview. the fact that my aunt worked in personnel helped too. so i interviewed in january. unfortunately, they didn't have any office positions open. so they would keep my application open for 6 months. consequentially, i forgot all about it. come june, almost 6 months exactly, i got a call from deka. so i went to interview for a position. didn't get it, but a week later, i got a call for a different position. after much rearranging, i finally went to the interview, and landed the position.

so here is where it gets a little tricky. they called an offered me the position. i accepted, and then the bombshell. oh, you have to go through the temp agency. wtf? so you interview me, you hire me, and THEN tell me i have to go through a temp agency. bullshit. there was no mention of this during the interview, AT ALL. if i would have taken a day or two to think about it, i may not have gone through with it. but the excitement of a new position and a new opportunity got the best of me, and i said ok without giving it much thought.

when i finally gave my notice, my supervisor wasn't surprised. i think she knew it was coming too. i wrote one for hr lady. just left it on her desk. i wasn't in the mood to deal with her (incidentally, she wasn't even there my last day, so my supervisor did my exit interview. made my last day so much more pleasant). it was really bittersweet. despite all the issues, i liked it there. i liked the people. but all it takes is one rotten egg to spoil the dozen.

i started at deka with high hopes. from what i heard, it was a great company to work for, good benefits, good pay, and closer to my house. so i thought this was a golden opportunity for me.

the process began with a three day orientation. about 30 people crammed into a freezing classroom for about 8 hours. not fun. what also ticked me off was including myself, there were three total temps. what made my position so different that it had to be a temp to hire deal? i started to get a bad feeling, but by then i was already committed, so there was no backing down. then came the rules. so many rules. i guess with that many employees, you have to have some kind of infrastructure or things won't go smoothly. but the kicker was the 6 month introductory period. and being a temp didn't count. so even if they hired me, when ever the temp period ended, i would have to start all over again. this did not make angie happy. at all. and with so many people, there wasn't really an opportunity to talk to anyone and say hey, how long is this thing going to last?

i finally got to start my job. the office was small, a four person team and two supervisors. all of the desks faced the corners. no radios allowed. i suppose they wanted to keep it fair because the plant wasn't allowed to have them, so that trickled over into the office too. so staring into a corner for 8 hours a day, and no music. some days it was so quiet in there, i just wanted to scream.

things were going well. i picked up the job quickly, followed the rules, and tried to make the best of it. one thing i couldn't get over was the fact that i was constantly sick. the first day i was there, within an hour, i had a massive sinus headache that i couldn't shake. from then on, it was followed by sinus problems, a persistent cough, sneezing attacks, or a combination of all three. and a great deal of misery on my end. and being a temp, i couldn't just call of and stay home. i would have had to had a doctor's note, and again with being a temp, no insurance. in retrospect, i should have sucked it up and gone, and figured out why i was having so many problems. it was something there that was causing my problems, and they should have footed the bill for it. after i left in february, i haven't been sick since. it took almost a month for my breathing to go back to normal, but there have been no more issues.

and then came the drug tests. they were supposed to be random, but without fail, around 8:15am, the first few days of the month, i was required to report to the medical building to pee in a cup. it was the most annoying thing ever. i always pee before i leave for work, so i would never have to go right away. then i would have to chug a bottle of water for their stupid drug test and constantly pee for the rest of the day.

three months comes and goes. nothing. i continue on doing, my job, playing by the rules. but i still didn't feel like i fit in. the other three girls had a sense of camaraderie because they had been working together for so long, and already had their group going. the main supervisor didn't even acknowledge my existence, unless i made a mistake (and these things happen, especially when you're learning a new job, and the computer system sucks), at which point she would talk to the lead agent in angry, whispered tones, all the while glaring at me over her shoulder. the lead agent would then get the job of explaining to me what i did, and how to fix it, in a positive, constructive way. this method being far more appropriate than the former.

the new year rolls around. i'm finally frustrated enough with the whole thing to come out and ask what my status is. but in comes that awful change again. one of the girls got a better position in a different building. so to me, this indicates, ok, it's going to take awhile to find a replacement, so my chances just went up pretty good, and i let it go. so she left, and we ran as a three person team for about two weeks.

on a friday afternoon, about a week before the incident, the lead agent pulls me aside to have a little chat. the plant manager wanted her to touch base with me, let me know my review was coming up, and wanted to see how things were going. this seemed like a good sign.

then the new temp comes. from what i understood, she had been a third shift plant worker, had been in a car accident, and could no longer work in the plant. so they brought her into our office. and apparently, even though she had been there for around three months, she had to start all over with the temp process.

i started to get that feeling again. things just didn't seem right. the first clue i got was the fact that they set up her computer for her right away. she got her log in and user information within the first few days. it took them two months to do mine. and that feeling just wouldn't go away, and i couldn't figure out why.

february 1, 2013.

the ball drops.

it's the end of the day on a friday, after a long week. i'm winding down my projects, getting ready to head out for the weekend, when the supervisor asks to talk to me. so we go to the conference room, and she introduces me to the guy in charge of temps. so he goes through his little spiel, and says, "due to lack of business, we have decided not to make your position permanent. we will not be filling the position at all. as of the end of the day, your assignment has ended."

so many things went through my head, the first being what the FUCK?!! of course the whole thing caught me completely by surprise, so i didn't say anything really except ok. and i was mad. boy, was i mad. and, the unfortunate part is, when i get REALLY mad, i cry. and then i get even madder, and cry even harder. while there were many things i should have asked and should have said, i couldn't, because i was trying my damnedest not to cry.

i went back to the office to pack my things, and i told the lead agent. she had no idea this was happening at all, and she clearly knew i was upset. the guy hovered around me while i packed, making me super uncomfortable, like i did something wrong. it was such a horrible feeling. i said goodbye, and that was it. he then followed me out to my car to get my parking permit, thus adding insult to injury.

after i got in my car, i let loose. i was livid. there are no words to describe how completely and utterly pissed off i was. so i called dave. he wanted to come get me, but i knew there was no way he would find deka. i composed myself enough to get home. my supervisor lives near me, and ended up following me for part of the ride home. it was all i could do not to just flip her off. i even went home a different way because i just couldn't take it.

the moral of the story? i will never take a temp to hire position again.

temp to hire is the biggest crock of shit ever invented. since i left deka, i've interviewed for a few temp to hire positions. one of my first questions is "what is the temp to hire time frame?" i've only gotten a straight answer once. a lot of the times, they say they don't know. it depends on business. and that's crap. the business world is uncertain, sure. but if you need someone for three months, tell them that. if you end up needing them longer, i bet they'll stick around. most people like a steady paycheck. i've had a couple interviews for temp jobs, and i usually ask if it could go permanent. most of the time they say no, but i'd much rather know than not. knowing you're going to be working somewhere for 6 months is so much more appealing than feeling like your job could just end any day. it gives you time to prepare and find something else. and wouldn't it be a nice surprise if at the end of the assignment they say "hey, you did a really good job. business is good, we'd like to hire you permanently."

for five months, i devoted myself to my new job and all i got from it was a permanent cold and a royal screwing. i think if they hadn't brought in a new temp, i wouldn't be so angry about the whole thing. there was already an open position in the department. if business was so bad, why bother filling it at all?

this is the way i see it. they got five months of free labor out of me. deka just didn't want to have to pay me more money and give me the benefits. they found a new temp who could do the job for them for free. and by the time she got to almost 6 months, they can replace her too. i really wish i would have asked why they brought in a new temp anyway. to this day, it still bugs me not knowing.

one of my co-workers got a job at deka. when i asked him about it, one of the first things i said was that i hope he actually got hired. he's a temp too. i then told him i hoped he didn't get screwed like i did.

and here i am. no full time job, working part time for minimum wage. yay for me.

but in the grand scheme of things, it hasn't been so bad. i have lots of time to craft. it's been pretty awesome. i'm looking for a job, but the pickings are slim. my search area is limited because i currently don't have the resources to relocate or to replace my 21 year old car that has 225k miles on it. so it gets frustrating, but i'm not giving up yet.

which leads to the otherwise. it hasn't been good. it hasn't been bad. it's been otherwise. looking back over the past year, if i would have stayed at the flag place, would i have been happy? probably not. would i even still be working there? i might have gotten frustrated and just quit. i don't know. if deka would have hired me, would i have been willing to sacrifice my health for the sake of a job? maybe, depends on how much they were going to pay.

i guess i'll never know. i'm on this path for a reason. for now i'll just keep trucking along until i figure out the otherwise.

changes, part 2

to continue on, we now talk about...

the good.

august 8, 2012.

i got a boyfriend.


so in the midst of my mom being sick, one would wonder how i had time to pursue a relationship. i didn't, really. it just sort of happened. and as it turns out, it was exactly what i needed.

i am not one who has a lot of relationship experience. before dave, i had one major relationship. and it was not the best. it lasted four years, and it took me almost that long to essentially find myself again. i gave up a lot of myself during that four years, and it was a difficult road to reassemble the pieces. i tried the online dating thing, but it didn't really work out. i went on one date. and some of the guys who contacted me were just weird.

there was this one guy, he seemed pretty nice, so we exchanged a few messages. one day he asked me if i was talking to anyone else. i was like yeah. to me, a dating website is like a party. you're there to meet people. you have to talk to people and get to know them, especially before going out and meeting a complete stranger. apparently, this was a big deal to him. even though we were just talking and had made no commitment to each other. so i ran the other way. and what ticked me off about it was that he wouldn't let it go. in fact, he compared it to cheating and hitting a girl, both of which are completely unrelated to talking to more than one person at a time on a dating website.

anyway, one of my friends was moving, and she had a few beatles things she wanted to get rid of. naturally, i was more than happy to take them off her hands. one day she texts me with something along the lines of "i know a nice guy who posts cute kitten pictures on facebook. want to meet him?" pretty random way to describe someone, but sure. what the hell.

so we decided to get together at her place, along with her husband, and two of their friends, who was dave's best friend and wife. i also got to meet her son for the first time. he was so cute (still is). anyway, it wasn't love at first sight, or anything like that. to use dave's favorite expression, it was "meh". we didn't even really talk. he played with the baby, was playing games with the boys, and pretty much checking me out from the corner of his eye. so the night ends, we go home. not sure what to expect at this point, but i figure it is what it is. get home, find facebook friend requests from all three of them. dave then posted a picture of the evolution of beatles hair on my wall, and asked me about my brother and how he was a fan of the band he plays in.

and that was it.

about a week later, i get a request to play words with friends with dave. so i accept, and find he has said hi as well. that's really when it started. it took a game of words with friends for him to talk to me. so we went back and forth, playing words, me losing badly. we just talked about random stuff, and i found myself really looking forward to it. even though i was working an 8-5 job, i found myself staying up past my bedtime just to talk to him. this was right when my mom got sick. and everyday he would ask how she was. that meant a lot to me, especially since we were still getting to know each other, and he knew how stressed i was.

about a week after our first game, a bunch of people were getting together to play games. this was probably the first time we actually talked. he managed to get the seat next to me. we were playing apples to apples and he was showing me his cards, one was a big hug. after the game, we went to the 5th street diner. we were there until almost 2am, and he even paid for my food. granted i only had a grilled ham and cheese, but still. it was a nice gesture. and sneaky too. i went to the bathroom, came back, and he had taken my check. he hugged me good night, and it seemed like he was really nervous. he even texted me to make sure i got home ok.

then on august 1, we had our first date. we ended up going out to lunch at applebee's because he works second shift, and i worked first, plus whenever i was scheduled at joann's. since my lunch break was an hour, and early enough for him to get to work on time, it seemed like a good choice. he was waiting for me when i got there. i went to give him a hug, and bam. he kissed me. sneaky guy. not that i minded, really. just caught me by surprise. he entertained me with stories of the library where he works. i wasn't very talkative, mostly because i was stressed and really tired from working and spending my evenings at the hospital. he was very understanding about it too. we had a good time. i know we were both sad when my lunch hour ended. so he kissed me good-bye, and i went back to work. still tired, but happy just the same.

later that day, i went to the hospital to see my mom. my brother left his lights on and needed to be jumped. so i went out to help him. we get his truck going and he says "you know you need a new tire, right?" huh? he points out that there's a flap of rubber peeling off my tire. so i park my car, curse my luck, and go back in. once visiting hours were over, i booked it over to pep boys. it was near closing time, so they almost weren't going to do it. i think the guy knew i was upset, so he did it out of pity. they put the tires on, and the guy says to me "i hate to tell you this, but you need breaks". that was it. that was the emotional breaking point of the day.  i sat in my car and cried. i was talking to dave, who had just finished working, and he told to me stay there, he would come over. so i waited. and then i get a phone call. "how do you get to pep boys?" i don't know why, but it made me laugh. i told him, and he came. he hugged me, and sat in the parking lot with me for two hours, just talking. it was just what i needed that day.

a week later, he asked me to be his girlfriend. and the rest, as they say, is history.

he came into my life when i needed him. he met me at my worst and still managed to see through it. he makes me laugh, he makes me smile. he knows what i need. like when i got "laid off" he knew i was really upset. he came to my house, and just held open his arms. didn't say a word. he just hugged me, and i felt so much better.

and at almost a year later, i'm so glad he's in my life. we talk every day, although we've moved up to facebook messenger. neither or us are big phone people, so it works. we still play words with friends all the time. i still lose. i can honestly say i've never won. but the scores are sometimes more evenly matched. only sometimes though.

he's a nerd, and awkward and sometimes really strange, but i wouldn't have him any other way.

i can't say for certain what the future holds, but i know it, he knows it and everybody else knows it. just gotta wait for dave time to catch up to real world time....

ch-ch-ch-chaaaaanges!!

i guess this is more of a retrospective than anything else. looking back at this time last year, between july and august, there were some big changes in my life. anyone who knows me, knows i don't like change. it's my antithesis, my kryptonie, my arch nemesis. we're talking big changes here. heck, when i quit my job at wendy's, i cried. hard. i had been there for almost 8 years. granted, it was time to move on, but still. it was a big change for me, and i took it hard. but the store didn't close without my mad burger flipping skills, and i didn't self-destruct because i wasn't serving fries. so we move on. but this time last year was hard for me. things still aren't stellar, but i think i've finally reached a point where i'm pretty satisfied with the way things are going. and it's because of the good, the bad, and the otherwise.

the bad.

july 25, 2012

my mom got sick. the hardest thing to deal with was it wasn't an obvious illness. it wasn't something with a name, like cancer, a stroke, or heart disease. it was some kind of infection that somehow settled into my mom's brain and eradicated a huge part of her memory. thankfully, it didn't affect her motor skills, but a big chunk of herself is gone. the doctors finally settled on encephalitis as the final diagnosis. another scary fact- they don't have a recovery rate. some people it's quick, sometimes a year, sometimes never. and with no insurance, my mom has had no follow up care. so she may never get better. and it's a damn shame.

anyway, it was strange in the way it happened. on monday of that week, my mom had been getting something from her car, and the dog ran out after her. the dog startled my mom, and she whacked her head on the inside of the car door. she wasn't feeling well for the next couple days, she had a headache and a stomach ache. and on wednesday, she disappeared. i came home from work, and no one knew where she was. this was very unlike my mom. she would always leave a note if no one was home, or tell someone where she was going if they were. she does have a cell phone, but doesn't always have it on. anyway, she finally came home, and when asked where she was, she couldn't talk. she was using words, but they were just words, no sentences, no structure. nothing. we wanted to take her to the doctor then, but she refused. we thought maybe it was a result of hitting her head. so my dad was trying to get her to talk while my sister and i were googling possible causes. our first thought was a stroke, but her motor skills were fine. she just couldn't talk. she was getting frustrated with the whole thing, so finally we just let her go and rest. so i go to work the next day, tired, unable to concentrate, and i start to get texts from my sister. my mom is worse. she can't talk at all now. she doesn't know who she is. we're going to the hospital. talk about longest day ever. so get done from work, zoom over to the hospital. she was still in emergency. they admitted her as soon as they found out she didn't know her name. they had done some preliminary tests, and managed to rule out some things, like a stroke, but they still had no idea what was going on.

so my mom ended up in the hospital for three weeks. it was not easy for any of us. whenever i wasn't working, i was sitting with her. my family is not the closest, and we're probably pretty dysfunctional, but we managed to keep ourselves together, and be there for my mom. and ironically enough, it is my mom that has kept us together for so long. so what do you do when your rock crumbles? you hold on as best you can.

three weeks is a long time, especially for someone used to be able to do what they want, when they want. my mom ended up depressed. she was frustrated, and she wanted to go home. for the first couple days, it was pretty scary. she didn't know any of our names, she didn't know her name, her address, anything. fortunately, we had an excellent support system, especially my aunt and my mom's friends from church. we tried to make sure she always had someone there, her meals were ordered, and she was as comfortable as possible.

they did a ton of tests on her, but once they settled on encephalitis, and got an anti-viral going, she started to show signs of improvement. in the beginning, she didn't know anyone's names, and most food was salad.  i was the first name she got. maybe i'm her favorite.... anyway, for awhile, everyone was angie. but things started to come back. it was a slow process, and some things will never come back.

so here we are a year later. anyone who knows my mom knows she's not the same person. first, she lost a lot of weight. a lot. it's probably a healthy weight for her, but she looks fragile now. she has become very schedule oriented. she likes to eat at a certain time, do things at a certain time, and sometimes gets upset when things get thrown off. she spends most of her time playing scrabble with my sister or solitaire. she resumed a lot of her activities at church again, but not nearly as much as she used to do. she still teaches sunday school and runs the harvest fest, but it's harder now since she gets tired more quickly. she cleans the church one day a week, so she at least gets out of the house sometimes. she doesn't like to drive much anymore. she worries a lot more now. i think the thing i notice the most is her eyes. looking back at old pictures, it's almost like the twinkle is gone. now her eyes always look sad.

sometimes i really miss the mom she was. but she's still my mom and i still love her. and i'm so grateful that it wasn't so much worse.

dog days of summer

ah, july. my least favorite month. mostly because it's long and it's so stinkin' hot. we're only 11 days in, and at least 9 of them have been in the 90's with super high humidity too. i can handle the heat, it's the humidity that gets me. and my hair. it's times like this i just want to chop it all off. it's really dark, thick and hangs to the middle of my back. and currently needs a trim. but anyway, i wear it back all the time but there's still so much attached to my head, it feels like i'm wearing a knit cap year round. in the winter, it's lovely. plus, the humidity makes it poofy, so it almost doubles. first world problems, i know.

sleeping is also a miserable occurrence in the heat. i live in an old, finicky building. my blow dryer sometimes blows a fuse. i hate to think what an air conditioner would do. so i suffer through. but the worst part is, i like to sleep with my butt covered. i find i'm cooler with my feet out. even in the winter. if i get too hot, the first thing out is my feet. which is why i don't like to wear shoes. ever. flip flops are my best friends in the summer. i'd wear them all the time if i could. but in the winter, my feet get cold when i go outside, so i wear shoes. as soon as i get home, off they come. anyway, back to sleeping. when it's hot, i end up with the sheet all bunched up around my middle and it becomes two or three layers. thus adding to the discomfort. so i think to myself, there has to be an easier way. so today, i made myself a butt blanket. just took a yard of cotton fabric, and hemmed it on all four sides. i figured that should be just enough to cover me and not be overwhelming like a sheet. and of course, it's not so hot today. now i have to wait to try it out. oh well.

another project i've been working on was two aprons for a friend. i used a basic apron pattern and added a ruffle. i'm quite pleased with the way they turned out.

 and there they are! and i figured out how to add pictures!!! how exciting!!

another big check off my to do list was my sister's bridal shower. it was june 29, and a lot of fun, but i'm so glad it's over. it was a lot of work. i made such cute little candle holders and a giant vase of flowers. i didn't take pictures, and i gave them to her future mother in law to use at her second shower. her fiance and family live in western pa and in md, so she gets two showers. but at least they will be put to use and not just sit in my craft room, get in my way and annoy me. her hat was epic though. i didn't get to see it, i got the job of holding it on her head, kinda like with the giant crowns in toddlers and tiaras. one thing i was super proud of was my vases of paper flowers. my boyfriend's best friend is getting re-married, i guess you could say, or vow renewal is better, and his wife made bouquets of paper flowers to use in the ceremony. i helped her put some together, and was totally inspired. of course, i had to make my own, with the help of my mom and older sister. they got so pretty everyone liked them too. i ended up giving a bunch away.

so pretty!!

in the midst of all this, i got word that i will be a vendor at the hamburger fest. i'm uber-excited!!! and trying not to panic. this will be the biggest show by far i have ever done. if i don't sell anything, i'm going to cry. really really hard. but i really don't think that will happen. since i make amiguruimi, i had to make a hamburger. i'm hoping they will be a big hit. i have no idea how many to make though. i plan on making two sizes, one with worsted weight, and one with fine yarn. 

i also plan on making some without faces, and different combinations. like on the smaller one, i left off the cheese. 

this was my double cheeseburger experiment. no face. i'm not sure quite how i feel about it yet though. i'll probably end up making more of the single patties.




i guess that's all for now. i have to get ready for dance practice. we are doing our first luau tomorrow, at hamburg's beach night. so very exciting. of our three dances, i'm sincerely hoping we're not doing our stick dance.

this is my tahitian outfit. everything i'm wearing, i made, except the skirt and necklaces. i just hope the skirt doesn't irritate my legs. i got sunburned last week on the top of my legs. it's mostly healed but still itches. oh well.

busy, busy, busy....

oh my poor devoted followers. how i've been neglecting you....

but especially for someone who doesn't have a full time job, and doesn't really have a life, i've been unbelievably busy. go figure.

anyway, since we last left our heroine, she got the bright idea to try a local craft fair. you know, make some extra money, get her name out there. as a general rule, i don't like to do outdoor shows. why? simple answer: the weather. but i decided to take a chance and give it a whirl. since it was the day before mother's day, i wracked my brain to come up with clever crafts for people to buy as last minute gifts. so in addition to my amiguruimi (crocheted animals) and my other stock, i added clothes pin bags, lightweight summery scarves, key chains and lanyards, and purse skirts to fit 31 bases. my motto is always go big or go home, meaning i ALWAYS over do it. i like to have variety and i like to have a lot. but in the end it almost kills me because i make too much and run myself down in the process. anyway, it rained. and i was so bummed. and it didn't just rain all day. nope. off and on, piddly little rain showers. enough to keep people away. but on the bright side, i made back my space fee and a little extra, so the day wasn't entirely wasted. and then right after i got everything away, the sun came out. full on. thanks, mother nature.

so that, in addition to making an afghan for a bridal shower, and working two overnight stocking shifts (which pretty much put me out of commission for almost two weeks), consumed my april and the first half of may.

then the following week, involved making three costumes for my upcoming dance recital. i can't believe i forgot about dance. i take polynesian dance at a local dance studio. this is my third year, and i love it. all of our costumes are handmade. so when you're in three dances, and you need three dresses, it's up to you to make them. thankfully, the tahitian dress (where we wear a grass skirt) is super simple. our dress for praise and our stick dance were both tricky. my praise dress ended up too small and i had to figure out how to add a panel without it being noticeable. but i succeeded and was able to participate in picture day. since i'm the resident crafter of the class, i ended up getting talked into making the tassel belts for two of my classmates, and one hat as well. not that i mind, really. i'm getting paid and it's something i enjoy doing. now i just have to wait until this weekend for recital. i'm SUPER excited.

that takes us to the end of may. after that, i was making wedding presents. i have three wedding to go to this summer. one was last weekend. super fun. i made a dress for the occasion. it was a beatles print fabric, matches my tattoo almost perfectly. every girl needs a dress to match her tattoo. seriously. the best part was that from far away, it just looks like a black dress with red, blue, orange, and green squares. but when you get up close, you can see it's the beatles. i need to figure out how to post pictures, because it is awesome.

the second wedding is a vow renewal for my boyfriend's best friend and his wife. so they get a handmade wedding present (which i actully finished this weekend, and used yarn from my hoard and ran out about 15 stitches from the end of the row. angry face. but it worked out in the end), plus i want to make a dress for that too. i have 6 yards of black and white polka dot fabric in my hoard, and a vintage-y pattern. so i think that's the route we're going to go.

the third wedding is my sister's. so of course, there will be epic amounts of handmade goodies for that. i don't need a dress because i'm in the wedding party and i have no choice in the matter. saves me some time. plus, i some how ended up in charge of the bridal shower. and i'd be a bad crafty sister if i didn't make stuff for that too.

i guess this being unemployed/working part time gig is working out for the best. if only the pay didn't suck....

anywho, i decided i'm going to take a chance on another outdoor show- the taste of hamburg-er festival labor day weekend in good old downtown hamburg. i sent in my application today. i hope they accept me! heck, 35,000 people came last year, and each year it gets bigger. if that's not an epic market to sell some stuff, i don't know what is! wish me luck!

introducing me!

i suppose if you're going to read my blog, you should know a little about me.

my name is angie. i'm 30, i live in a small town in PA called hamburg, about an hour and a half northwest of philly. our claim to fame is cabela's. i work part time at joann fabric, after having been "laid off" (and i use that term very loosely) in february from my job at a battery manufacturer. i've been at joann for a year now, having started there part time when the new store opened close to where i was working for a flag company. joann is a blessing and a curse, the blessing being they were able to help me out after i was laid off, the curse being the 20% discount is hazardous to my wallet. i'm sure joann will come up frequently in my ramblings.

other things i'm likely to talk about:

my cat.

she's 15, i've had her for half my life, go figure that one. she's fat, crotchety, and old but she's my baby and i love her. the past few years i've been trying to brace myself for the day i know will come eventually, morbid as that may sound. but if you have pets, you know what i mean.

my boyfriend.

he's the greatest thing since sliced bread. he's cute, bald and bearded. and a nerd. but so sweet and nice. he got me a kindle fire for valentine's day. he treats me like a princess. and i could just keep going and going and going and going......

my 'stang.

i have a blue 92 mustang that i've been driving around in for the past nine years. it breaks, i get mad, i fix it and the cycle repeats. but i love my stang, i've always wanted a mustang, and i'll probably never be able to get one again. so i'm going to hold on to old blue as long as i can. the goal is 300k miles.

the beatles.

i love the beatles. how much? enough to get them tattooed on my back last summer. it's an awesome tattoo. it's the beatles without obviously being the beatles. funny story about the beatles. i discovered them late in life (when i was in college), having found a stash of beatles records at goodwill one day. i only bought two, and i still kick myself to this day for not buying them all. anyway, my intent was to sell them. however, after i got them home, i looked at the songs, and was hey, i know these. this was back when napster was still around, so i would spend hours finding beatles songs to download over dial up no less, and my love affair was born. it was the first band i ever really connected to. i was also lucky enough to go to liverpool. that was an awesome experience, which i'm sure will come up again.

and most importantly, my crafts.

i am a crocheter. i love it. i tried knitting, but the two sticks just didn't work out. ambidextrous i am not. i'm self taught. i taught myself via dvd in 2008 after a bad break-up with my ex boyfriend. he broke my car window on my birthday. i was depressed and needed something to get my mind off it. not that that was the only reason. i had attempted to teach myself several times before, the results were not good. this was the time it finally clicked. i love making amigurumi. i'm trying to work out my own patterns, but this is part of the add where i get distracted by other things. i also like making afghans, simple patterns though, where i can turn on the tv, and just go. i have no patience for doilies, or anything with really fine yarn. i've tried. they end up in my ufo pile.

i am a sewer. again, mostly self taught, except for the basics i learned in 7th grade home ec. i sometimes wonder what path i would have taken had the sewing really stuck in 7th grade. maybe my life would be different. who knows. anyway, i make mostly clothes and bags. i've tried my hand at stuffed animals too. i get frustrated with clothes because the vision i have in my head and the finished product don't always mesh. case in point: i bought this really pretty cotton gauze fabric to make a tunic for myself. i finish, try it on, hate it. in my head, it looked different. after trying  it on, it just seemed frumpy. so i got annoyed, i folded it, added it to my unfinished going to goodwill pile, and moved on.  enter my mom. she loved it. and she tried it on. granted, it was too big, but it still looked really nice on her. much better than it looked on me. so i took it in, took three inches off the hem, and gave it to her. at least is wasn't wasted. i got this awesome avengers fabric and i really want to make a dress from it. my fear is that i will hate it and have wasted all that awesome fabric. or that i'm not brave enough to wear it. we shall see.

other crafts i do include cross stitch, embroidery, i make rosaries (beaded and knotted twine) and sometimes i paint. not like portrait painting, but i do freezer paper stencils on fabric and one thing i'm working on is a wooden crate. i also painted a wooden bookcase my grandfather made a bright blue and green. this was about three years ago, and to this day, the green paint is still not totally dry. it sticks to my stuff and peels off. makes me mad. i showed the finished product to my grandfather. he smiled at me and shook his head.

i will also try anything once. more that once if i like it. i really want to try pottery, like on a wheel. i suspect it would be rather disastrous, but it sure would be fun to try. the goggleworks, a  local art gallery in reading, offered a date night around valentine's day for couples to try. but since i wasn't working, it didn't pan out. one day i will get my hands on some clay. i tried weaving once. the concept was neat, but my add kicked in, and i never finished my project. and i just sold my loom because it had been sitting unused for the past two years. now i just need to unload my weaving books.

and that was a lot longer than i intended. i am a writer at heart, so once i get going, it's hard to stop. my goal is once a week, depending on what i'm doing and what projects i have going.

let the games begin!

so i have a blog now.......

well.

this is an interesting development.

i have started a blog.

i need a way to get my crafty-ness out there, so maybe i can write about stuff i do (and don't do) and maybe people will find me interesting.

who knows?